No one's looking!

I feel like a blinked a while back, and when my eyes opened everything had changed. When did we become so irresponsible? I have a really hard time struggling with the all too frequently accepted notion that if I don't get caught, then I didn't do anything wrong. I see it in my students, I see it at the store, on the road, and even in some friends and family. When will we realize that rules are there for a reason and that by not following them, someone is inevitably going to get hurt?

As Kindergarten as it sounds, rules are there to protect us. Laws, if followed, protect us. Yet while everyone knows this basic fact, people still take things that don't belong to them, speed, blow through red lights, and so much more. I guess if no one catches me doing these things, then I am off the hook. Or am I?

Eventually our deeds catch up to us. Eventually we do get caught. Some of us are lucky enough to be caught and given the consequence of a ticket, or a stern reprimand, or another consequence as the case permits, but others aren't so lucky. Other times people do get hurt, physically or emotionally, or worse. If everyone was ott looking out for Number 1 and started looking out for 2, 3, 4, and 5, we would not have to look out for Number 1 anymore. There would be a larger team doing that for us.

Doing the right thing, whether someone is looking or not is our responsibility. It's called integrity. And unfortunately, it's extremely lacking in our society. When will people start caring about others beyond themselves again? What is it going to take for all of us to be more caring and kind to one another? When will we realize the bigger picture and that we are not individually at the center of it? We're all in this together, as the saying goes. We need to look out for each other even if no one is looking at us.

Take care of each other this holiday season and try for beyond that.

So Thankful!

This Thanksgiving, I have A LOT to be thankful for. Here's my list in no particular order:

1. The most supportive, unfailingly loving parents anyone could ever wish to have

2. The most caring, giving, kind-hearted, loyal sister

3. The most understanding, loving, considerate, handsomest boyfriend who lets me be me and loves me unconditionally

4. A wonderful extended family.

5. The cutest dog ever

6. Not only having a job, but having a job I LOVE.

7. I am still here!

8. Holidays spent with family

9. The best set of colleagues whom I can call friends

10. I still have 3 out of 4 grandparents.

11. Second chances and new beginnings

12. A roof over my head

13. The internet

14. Reconnecting with long lost best friends

15. Money in the bank

16. Glee and Grey's

17. Eager and willing students

18. Newfound faith and God's grace

19. The Twilight Series

20. iPod and iPhone

21. Music and musical theatre

22. A happy childhood and a bright future

What are you thankful for? Whatever it is, I hope you reflect on and recognize all of the blessings in your life.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Spare change

As I was finishing up at the gas station this morning a small woman in a motorized wheel chair, maybe early 40's, rolled up and very politely asked if I could spare any change. She said she had a very sick child with cancer and even a penny would be very much appreciated. Normally, I don't give money to people who approach me as I know many of them are living better off than I am, but sometimes there's something about a person that just let's you know that times are really hard and they really need some help.

I don't know if this woman was telling the truth. I gave her a dollar - it was all I had in my wallet. I know that for the person who really needs the money, it's got to be so very difficult to approach strangers for help. And for those that don't need it and are looking to scam others for an easy life, well that's on their heads. I can only do what I feel is right and show compassion. I have had my struggles and will continue to have challenges in my life as everyone does, but there are definitely people out there who are way worse off than I am.

Have you ever...

written a blog, then decided it's not for public consumption and just erased it?

To flu shot? Or not to flu shot?

That is the question. Typically, I come down with a major cold or the flu every other year. Three years ago, I went in to get a flu shot. The line for the shot was so long, (and I'm a big needle chicken) that I opted for the nasal flu "shot". The nasal vaccine is actually made of the live flu virus, so chances of flu-like symptoms are much greater than if one gets the injection. Needless to say I got the flu, or rather the flu-like symptoms which were just as bad as the flu minus the fever. As a result, I haven't gotten a flu vaccine since.

This year, I am faced with a dilemma. Because of my car wreck late this summer, I have not been able to work and so have used up all of my sick days and then some. The other guy's insurance company has assured me that my sick days will be "paid back" and I will be compensated for lost wages, but the question is - When? I imagine a settlement is not going to happen in the immediate future since I am still seeing doctors and recovering so that leaves me with a huge problem. I am out of sick days. What happens if I get the flu and who pays for that time off? After all, I would have sick days if they hadn't been drained by someone else's careless actions. I try to be a proactive person whenever possible. Do I take my chances with the flu, with this being the "on" year where I usually get sick? Or do I get a flu vaccine? AND if I get vaccinated, which vaccine do I get? The regular flu vaccine? Or the Swine Flu vaccine? Both? TWO SHOTS??? That thought makes me want to jump out of my skin.

As a teacher, I am surrounded by grubby (and I use that term lovingly) adolescents all day long. They have grubby siblings with grubby friends and are germ incubators. Hand sanitizer can only do so much and though I know it's important to stay clean, I don't like rubbing chemicals all over my hands all day long. I already made a personal rule last year of no high fives or fist bumps with my students, which is too bad, because those are great ways to connect with kids. So, do I even have a choice?

It's pretty evident that I need to get a flu shot, so which do I get? Your thoughts? Do I get both? I can't afford to take any more time off, monetarily or at the expense of my students (though I have been very blessed to have amazing guest teachers).

A couple of things...

I love it when I find a gift card I forgot I had. I found an It's a Grind gift card in my purse a couple of weeks ago when I was cleaning it out. I assumed there was a buck or two left on it since it wasn't in any special place in my wallet. I usually keep things like loaded gift cards in a certain spot in my wallet. I walked into It's a Grind this afternoon, needing a little pick me up, and handed my gift card to the girl at the counter. I told her I wasn't sure what was on it so she said, "No problem," and swiped the card. After my purchase I had over $14 still on the card. Sweet! I have emergency It's a Grind $$$ when I get to go back to work.

Dr. Scholl is my feet's lifesaver! I bought a pair of cute black shoes that I can wear with slacks last week. Kyle and I had an event to attend Saturday night, so I thought that would be the perfect time to break them in. I figured this was a sit-down sort of deal so there wouldn't be a whole lot of walking. My flat feet don't handle new shoes very well the first time around, especially if they aren't sneakers. Well, let's just say there was A LOT more walking than had been anticipated and by the end of the evening, my feet were screaming at me. I was a little annoyed because I figured if my feet were this sore after one evening, there would be no way my feet would survive a day at work in these shoes. *sigh* So, today I went to Target and picked up some Dr. Scholl's gel inserts. "Aaahhhhhhh!" (Heavenly choir of angels singing) I could run around all day in these shoes now!

And now for something stupid:

I bought a curling iron today as well. The one I had been using kept shutting off on it's own. New curling irons usually come with warning tags that often say something to the effect of "Do not use while bathing." or "Do not use while sleeping." I was always amused by these warnings because someone (and it's usually more than just one person's stupidity to constitute a warning label) had to have done these things and gotten injured. My new iron had a new warning label which read "Caution: This product can burn eyes." ?????? Really?

A Summer Reflection

It has been requested that I write a new blog since my last entry is dated in May. You could say a lot has happened to me since that last blog. I finished an amazing school year with some of the best students I've had so far. I had a fun summer that started out with an awesome trip to Washington DC, Philadelphia, and New York City. I had the honor of being a bridesmaid in my cousin Olivia's wedding. That was a blast! I got to spend a lot of time with my wonderful boyfriend of almost two years now. And, I was in a horrible car wreck that I still refuse to call an accident.

I learned a lot about myself this summer. I'll write on the other topics at a later time, but my trip back east definitely made a mark. Traveling with 40 teens and parents across the country with little sleep and lots of moving pushed me to some limits by the end for sure, but it was a trip I will remember for the rest of my life and I hope the kids were as impacted by it as I was. Having been a kid who took this trip in middle school, I can assure you that I got more out of it the second time around as an adult, but there were definitely some moments that I know left a wrinkle or two in their brains.

There were so many things that made me ponder this amazing country we live in. All of the monuments and memorials of great people and leaders; the things they stood for and fought for really gave me a deeper appreciation for what this country is supposed to represent. I really think the current leaders in Washington ought to take a spin around the capital building to all of the monuments and reflect on who they are there for and what they set out to accomplish with this country.

There were many highlights of this trip between the museums, especially the Newseum and the Holocaust Memorial Museum, the Statue of Liberty, and the Washington Monument, but my favorite part was seeing Wicked on Broadway. I loved it, but what made it even more special were the students (who all know how much I love the show) who were so awestruck by the performance and the message. It made me proud to be a Drama teacher.

Wicked

Saturday night I finally got to do what I have been waiting almost 4 years to do. I got to see Wicked!! I have been planning for this night since I heard the show was coming back to San Francisco and it was an amazing night.

Mom, Dad, Kyle's moms, Kyle, and I went together. Kyle's mom arranged for a limo to pick us up in Hayward, a brilliant idea on Barb's part. I never look forward to driving in the city so this was awesome! We were picked up promptly at 4:00 pm, but not before Barb realized I had given her their tickets months ago and she couldn't find them. It's all good though, because our big panic happened early in the evening and ended quickly with the tickets being exactly where they were supposed to be.

We were whisked away by our wonderful limo driver to the Cliff House at Ocean Beach. We were seated right away at a table with a beautiful albeit gray view of the ocean. The water was rough, and the temperature was cold, but the restaurant was warm, bright, and pleasantly bustling which made the view that much more spectacular since we were glad we weren't on one of the little boats being tossed around on the water a couple of miles out.

I recommend our waiter, Michael to anyone who visits the Cliff House. He was very attentive, knowledgeable, and fun. He and the rest of the staff were quick and, but not so fast that we felt rushed. I had delicious Dungeness Crab Cakes to start, Bay Sea Scallops with English peas (never had those before - they were tasty) for my main dish and shared Banana Walnut Bread Pudding with Kyle for dessert. After two hours, six appetizers, six entrees, four desserts, two bottles of wine, and a very LARGE bill :) we were on our way to see the show!

I felt like a kid on Christmas Eve the whole ride to the Orpheum. We couldn't get there fast enough. We pulled up with perfect timing, ten minutes to show time! We made our way through the crowd to our second row loge seats and the show started right on time. Our seats were almost perfect, a little to far to the side, but we could see everything easily. From the moment the Time Dragon Clock started shaking and the orchestra hit that first note, I was sucked in. I wanted to cry for the first ten minutes I was so happy. I couldn't believe I was finally seeing the show.

I have to admit, I was a little disappointed to see "stand by" next to Elphaba's actress's name (Dee Roscioli), but was blown away by how good she was that I had a hard time believing that the main actress would be any better. Her high notes seemed effortless. I was mesmerized by the whole show. Kendra Kassebaum, who played Glinda, was a total spaz at times but endearing and I really enjoyed her in that part. All of the characters were exactly as I had hoped they would be, although I thought Patty Duke as Madame Morrible could have done a bit better.

The evening flew by but I enjoyed every minute of it. I had so much fun with everyone and was especially glad that I got to share this experience with my parents. I really hope Kyle enjoyed it as much as he says he did. I meant a lot to me to have him, his moms and my parents there. This experience will stay with me for a very long time. I can't wait to see it in New York in a couple of weeks! It'll be by charter bus, but it WILL be BROADWAY!!! Though I can't imagine it topping our evening of Wicked in San Francisco.

Grandparents

More and more everyday, I realize how lucky I am that the three grandparents I have left are in good health and still able to get around pretty well. Most of the people I know that are my age have either lost all of their grandparents or their grandparents are no longer able to take care of themselves.

I lost my Grandpa Gus in 1996 from complications to his cancer recovery, but Grandma Mary, Grandpa Manuel, and Grandma Rachel are all still here and I am so thankful that I can still visit with them (although I don't visit with them as often as I would like to) and talk to them about what's new. Grandpa is turning 80 next month, which is so hard to believe. For me, he stopped aging in his 60's. Grandmas did too. I know they aren't going to be around forever, none of us are, but I'm glad I still have them around right now.

Swearing Update

End of Day 4 of Project No More Swearing and I have yet to have a completely successful day but dang it, I'm trying. I am much better at watching my mouth at work because my surroundings help dictate the language I use, and since I am surrounded by minors with conservative parents I have an easier time of holding back my language. However, lunchtime at school is usually a different story since most of us around our lunch table usually let colorful adjectives fly without a second thought, but since I am at work, I still have an easier time of holding back. Now at home, that's been a lot harder. I am swearing a lot less often than normal, I have not yet been able to kick it altogether but I still have hope. Maybe if I have to put a dollar in a jar every time I say a naughty word I will improve and eliminate the problem altogether. I better check my wallet for ones and fives just in case. Sorry J-man, I'm trying.

I give up!

Tomorrow is the beginning of Lent. For those of you who don't know, Lent celebrates the 40 days and 40 nights that Jesus suffered and bore his cross before he was crucified. Along with not eating meat on Fridays and for Ash Wednesday, Catholics must give up something to recognize all Christ gave up for us to save our souls. SO, since I do it WAY too much, I'm giving up cussing. That's right, I can't say bad words after midnight tonight. This out to be interesting. Wish me luck!

Happy Lent!!

$UCK$

I just paid about $250 to the great state of California to renew both my car registration, and my teaching credential. Nevermind the fact that the state owes me about that much in the form of a tax refund, but I'm expected to accept an IOU. I would love to see the look on the face of the office personnel at the CA Commission for Teacher Credentialing or the DMV if I handed them an IOU but whatever. Now I get to drive my car legally for another year and continue to pay ridiculous gas prices, and work as an underappreciated, underpaid, contractless, overworked teacher for another five years.

I guess I have a pretty stable job at least and I love doing it, but I would also love being paid more closely to what I am worth - that's another blog for another day. Until then, I will continue to pay to work and drive in this poorly managed state that is now 50th in the USA for spending in the area of education.

Seriously!

I work with many professional, well-educated men. These men have families and wives. Some hold several degrees, have succeeded in many careers, and are valuable assets to our school. Why is it then, that with so much that skill and talent that they possess, can they not avoid PEEING ON THE SEAT?!?! WTF?!?! It's not like the bowl has a small opening, or even that you can't lift up the seat. You can't tell me that you are so busy that you can't A) pick up the seat or B) wipe up after yourself. Do we have to leave Cheerio targets in the bowl? I mean, I hover for a reason, it's so I don't have to clean up after you before I go, (and believe me, hovering is a lot harder than the straight shot that you have!) So please, for the love of all things sanitary, clean up your spray! Thank you.

Overrated

Every relationship I've ever been in has been with a guy who thinks that Valentine's Day is overrated. While I've always agreed that this entirely commercial holiday was invented by Hallmark to make some change, I've always been a little resentful of the attitudes my significant others had. They always seemed put out by the idea of one particular day to show love for one's partner when they "could just show it all year long." I see now that the problem was that love wasn't shown all year long.

My man gets it! For the first time in my life, I would have absolutely no hurt feelings if he chose not to observe it because he makes me feel like every day is Valentine's Day. Truly. I love and appreciate Kyle so much. I am so thankful to have him in my life.

Going down

Alright, I'm back at it again. I've lost 2.6 lbs. this week. I haven't really exercised but I plan on starting. I've mostly just been watching what I put down the trap. It really hasn't been hard, I think mostly because my partner in crime is doing it with me. My goal is to be down 15 lbs. by April and then we'll see how it goes, hopefully another 10 by June. After all, I have a bridesmaid's dress I have to look hot in! Though that is not my reason for doing this. It just helps that I ordered one smaller than my current size.

Just a thought

Does anyone else see that continuously comparing Obama to Lincoln is a really bad idea? I mean, we all know how Lincoln ended up. I'm just sayin'.

Your MOM is honest!

This is the second or third time I've been tagged for that "Honesty" thing, so I figured I'd better do it now.

So now I have to write ten random honest things about myself then tag seven other people who blog. This should be interesting since I have like two whole readers on here.

Here's my ten:

One - Around Christmastime when I has six, maybe seven, my mom told me to leave the Christmas lights on the tree alone. She told me that every year. This time I didn't listen and I went to plug them in. I must have been touching the metal of the plug because then I felt a poweful zap and saw everything in skeleton vision (ya know, like in cartoons when a character gets electrocuted). How much does that explain about me! Oh, and I don't think I ever told her. The currents through my body was enough to keep me from doing it again. I didn't need to be yelled at.

Two - Sometimes at night, especially if everyone else is asleep already, I still have to take a flying leap from the middle of my room to my bed so the monsters underneath can't grab me. I also have to sleep with my fingers and toes under a pillow or blankets so said monsters won't eat them while I slumber.

Three - I HATE being in school. I love teaching. I hate studenting. (I have an English degree. I can make up words.)

Four - I loathe drivers from Oregon. The speed limit is 65 buddy!!!

Five - I regret giving up choir. I know one is supposed to live life without regrets, but I was happiest when I was singing and I never should have given it up. Karaoke's just not the same.

Six - I spend way too much time driving and on the computer - not simultaneously of course.

Seven - I refuse to drink the water at work because I am convinced that I will be the next one to be knocked up. Seriously.

Eight - Sometimes while driving to work I space out for miles and can't remember the drive from the levee to the freeway. It really freaks me out when I do this in the fog.

Nine - I recently started going back to church and love it. I don't know why I stopped going for so long.

Ten - My favorite place to go is the beach. When I die, I want to be scattered at the beach. Beach location to be determined at a later date.

These seven people need to do their own list now. You're welcome!

1. Kyle
2. Jenn
3. Nichole
4. Joel
5. Lindsay
6. Jaime
7. Deanna

A plug for drinking...

The evening before New Year's Eve I decided to finally get my papers done for an online class I'd signed up for through University of San Diego. I had to read a book and then complete four papers on different prompts for the book. Well, I read the book last summer and never got around to writing the papers. I mean, I had nine months to complete this thing... what can I say? I'm a procrastinator.

So anyway, I'm at the counter working on the first paper (by the way, I don't do drafts) and my sister pops open a bottle of wine. Who am I to turn that down. Wine hits me FAST and before I knew it I was on my second paper with a happy little buzz. By the fourth paper I was definitely drunk but was as focused as ever to finish this paper. Well I did, and then I thought to myself, "Self, should I review these in the morning before I fax them off for a grade?" NOPE. I had them faxed over that evening, which was difficult because I have a hard enough time with fax machines when I'm sober, but I got it through.

I got my grade in the mail on Friday and managed to get an A for my thoughtful analysis and response! I should have drunk more in college. I would have been a much better English student and had a much better transcript. :)

Highs and Lows - 1/5/09

My high for today was that I got an email from a director in Indiana who said he heard some great things about my musical that I finished last month and wanted to know if I could help him out with his show. INDIANA!!! I mean, I knew I was a rock star, but damn! HAHA!!

My low for today was that I had to get up early this morning.